Wisdom & Wit

Wisdom and Wit

R’ Eizel Charif came to a wealthy man to ask him to contribute to a certain noble cause. The wealthy man rejected the appeal, claiming that he was supporting a poor brother and thus had no money to spare for any other tzedaka.
Some time later, R’ Eizel found out that he man had been lying. He was not supporting his brother and, on the contrary, his brother had been reduced to begging for alms.
R’ Eizel returned to the wealthy man and told him: “I have a Torah thought I’d like to convey to you. We are told in Avos (5:10), “One who says, “What is mine is mine and what is yours is yours” -  that is the common type. Others says that is a characteristic of those who lived in S’dom (i.e. that is totally evil).” This argument seems strange, because the two sides are interpreted the same words in diametrically different ways. The explanation of this Mishna, though, is as follows: “One who says, “What is mine is mine and what is yours is yours” refers to people who have relatives to support. If a person is willing to support his own relatives and to have others support their relatives, that is a common type of person. However if ‘others say’ if a person merely SAYS that he will support his own relatives but does, in fact, not do so, that is a characteristic of those who lived in S’dom.”
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The first time R’ Nachum of Biala met the woman who would later become his wife, he told her: “I want you to realize that shadchanim - marriage brokers - have a tendency to exaggerate. I therefore want you to know that, regardless of what you might have been told, I am not wise, nor a Torah scholar, nor one who has yiras Shamayim - fear of heaven - nor am I one who performs acts of chessed - lovingkindness.”
His future wife told him, “I am willing to marry you because of one virtue of yours that the shadchan did not even mention: that you a person who tells the truth.”

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