Jewish Law

Lesson # 498 - CONSENT OF WOMAN REQUIRED

A woman cannot be betrothed without her consent. If a man were to betroth a woman against her will, it is not a valid betrothal. However, if a man was coerced into betrothing a woman the betrothal is valid. There is also an opinion that in the latter situation the betrothal is not valid. Therefore, there is a doubtful betrothal.
A woman said to a man betroth me and he threw an object into her lap and declared “you are betrothed unto me” and she immediately threw the object from her lap and said she was joking when she said to him betroth me, it is nevertheless a valid betrothal. As stated in Shulhan Aruch we cannot rely on the thoughts that a person may have in mind but rather on their actions and declarations.
A man took the hand of a woman with force and placed an object into her hand and said she was betrothed to him and she did not throw away the object when thrust into her hand, the betrothal is valid. This presupposes that when he took her hand and thrust the object there into it they were discussing becoming betrothed.
A man owed a woman money and she said to him give me the money and when he started to give her the money he said you are betrothed to me with this money and she threw the money out of her hand, there is no valid betrothal.
If a man betrothed a woman in front of only one witness, the betrothal is not valid. This holds true even if both the man and woman stated that he gave her the money for betrothal. The betrothal is not valid if he betrothed her in front of one witness and thereafter betrothed her in front of a second witness, there is no valid betrothal.
The is an opinion that they may be betrothed if he betrothed her in the presence of one witness and both the man and wife state that he did and she accepted. This is a situation where we follow the most stringent view in the matter. But if either the man or woman contradicts the one witness, the betrothal is not valid. If there are serious consequences to the woman, we take the lenient view that she is not betrothed.
The single witness is not given credence even if he states that the betrothal took place in front of himself and another witness, and the other witness says he did not see the betrothal take place. The same holds true even if there were two witnesses, but one of the witnesses was a relative of one of the parties. The result is the same as if he betrothed her in the presence of only one witness.
The man and woman must see the witnesses and the witnesses must see the man and woman. If the man and woman saw one of the witnesses and not the second one there is no valid betrothal; for example they were outside the room where the betrothal was taking place and they could see in but the man and/or woman could not see out. If a woman agreed to accept betrothal from the man but she was not aware that there were two witnesses watching them, it is not a valid betrothal. She claims that she was only joking with the man when she said she would accept the betrothal since she did not know there were witnesses who could see the transaction. However if she denies that she accepted any object from the man and the witnesses say they saw her accept the object she is betrothed since she is disputing two witnesses as to a fact.
If he betrothed her in the presence of two witnesses, she is betrothed although no one said to the two witnesses be witnesses in this matter. Even if there were witnesses who were designated to be the witnesses to the betrothal, any other men who were present and saw the betrothal can be the witnesses to the betrothal. It is necessary that the witnesses see the giving of the object into the hand of the woman or into her domain such as her yard near her house. But if they did not see the actual giving of the object from him to her, even if they heard the man say you are betrothed with this object and they thereafter see the object in her hand, it is not a valid betrothal. Assume that she is standing on one side of a fence and he is on the other side of the fence and there is a hole in the fence large enough to stick a hand through and a hand was thrust through the hole and he says he gave the object into the hand and said you are betrothed unto me and she says she did not hear him say the words of betrothal she is believed and there is no valid betrothal. She could have said it was not her hand. However, if witnesses testified in Beit Din that they were present and she heard and saw what was occurring, she is betrothed.
In the event of her stating she was not betrothed and there are witnesses who contradict her, some of the situations are as follows:
If the witnesses outside of Beit Din stated that they saw the entire transaction that she was betrothed, they can recant their words when they come to Beit Din.
Or else they stated outside of Beit Din that there was no betrothal they can recant their words in Beit Din.
The witnesses to the betrothal are not subjected to vigorous cross examination as they would be in a civil trial; unless the Beit Din suspects that there is false testimony being given.
Assume a document was produced that this man betrothed that woman and there are witnesses’ signatures on the document. Unless the document is authenticated in Beit Din it has no validity.
If the witnesses to the betrothal are not eligible to testify according to Torah law, the document is invalid. But if they are ineligible to be witnesses according to Rabbinic law or if thy are of doubtful Torah ineligible, the betrothal is of doubtful nature and she requires a Get to be free to marry.
Or the couple can now get married with proper witnesses. Even if she says there was no betrothal, we compel the husband to give her a Get. The situation is the same in all of the circumstances if there is a doubt as to the legality of the betrothal he can betroth her a second time or give her a Get.
Rabbi Moshe Isserles has a paragraph regarding witnesses to the betrothal who lived in countries where they were compelled to openly reject their practice of Judaism. How should such witnesses be accepted in matrimonial matters?  - to be continued

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